Sunday, March 25, 2018
Friday, March 23, 2018
Ziyan's First Story Time
It's Friday which means Ziyan and I are out doing all the things we need to do. When I had two kids and only worked 3 days a week, I arranged a mix of doing kid friendly activities and getting all the work done that is required to make her house run successfully on my days "off" (I.e. not in my office). Since I've had Ziyan, I have worked full-time and he's just had such a different experience with me. I manage to squeeze my full time schedule into four long do and sooner late nights so we still have Fridays just us. We have fun on Fridays and he loves being with me and getting all of the special attention but we don't do kid things.
Today, after going to two grocery stores, we went to the library to return books. When we walked in, I realized toddler storytime was just starting. So we went in. Apparently toddler storytime is on Fridays, the one day that I don't work. My son is almost 2 years old and I've never taken him to Story Time. When Zayd was a baby I planned my part-time schedule around brunch with my mommy friends and storytime at the library. Ha ha. Poor third child!
Z3 was transfixed. He enjoyed exactly 25 minutes of baby story time and then was ready to leave. He watched intently and was silent. My child is never silent. He talked non-stop through the entire grocery store. He talk to every person that passed. He said "Mommy go go go, Mommy go go go, Mommy go go go" maybe five hundred times. He said almost nothing it's story time. Just before he was ready to leave he did start pointing out to me that there were other babies in the room. "Baby. Baby. More babies." Then we went to the playground and he played for a few minutes before all the baby's got out of story time. When they came to the playground, he again stopped and stood and watched. I really think Ziyan didn't realize there were so many other little kids in the world.
It made me think that maybe he's ready for school. Maybe he should be around other little kids. Zahra was about this age when she started and it was great for her. Zayd started at 3 and the transition was terrible. I'm not saying the timeline affected their transitions because they're totally different kids but, either way, time is ticking. Z3 will be 2 in May.
Afterward, we came home and I put him down for his nap. And when I see him all snuggled up in his bed, he definitely does not look like he's ready for Montessori School. He's not ready to sleep on a mat. He's still my baby, two or not.
I promised to take him back to Story Time next week.
Tuesday, March 20, 2018
Ten Years but I'm lucky. I still see her everywhere.
10 years ago today I spent my last day with my grandma. I can't remember the details of the day, to be honest, but I don't think she spoke with me on this day. We were past that. I remember the night. I spoke with her for hours and hours. And we were together. And some of the woman warriors of my family were there and we sang. My grandma always sang at the top of her lungs and especially in the car.
Everyone should die surrounded by people that love them. And those people should love each other. I'm personally so grateful that I had that.
I think about her all the time but 10 years is a big number. So I just wanted to write down that I love my grandma and I miss my grandma and as I watch my 3 kids play in my backyard I imagine that she might be watching them too. And she'd be really proud that they play outside. And that they think ice cream is a health food. And that they don't wear clothes what's designer names printed across the front. She was exceptionally opposed to using your body for "free advertising". She would like that they drink tea and we would all drink tea together. She'd be happy that I've sewed them pajama pants and that Zahra thinks she's going to be the president. Zayd's politics would tickle her and he is such a political boy. She would be so taken with Zahra. She's basically like my grandma with a tan. Zayd would hug her the most, and talk to her on the phone, and ask her questions about her life. Z3 is such an explosion of energy these days I honestly can't imagine he how he would fit into that world. She be impressed that he knows some of his colors, speaks with small sentences, and she'd smile at his contagious smile. But she would hate how loud he scream talks. Except maybe she wouldn't know that it's scream talking because she'd be pretty darn old.
She lived a good life and full life and I would never dare say she was taken too soon. But it wouldn't have bothered me one bit if she'd live to one hundred.
Today I'm going to light the candle that I lit at her funeral and let it burn on my dining room table. She would appreciate my table. It's solid wood and mercilessly marked up by children who act like children. And I'm going to hope that she visits me when I'm sleeping.