Monday, December 3, 2012

On the Third Day of Zahra...

...I wish her grace, graciousness, and gratitude.


Grace

elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or action

Today on my car ride home, NPR had a story about mapping the human genome and how easy it would be to do it during the heel prick that almost every newborn in the US receives at birth. They talked to a mom who actually opted to have it done to rule out a sleep disorder because her preemie was having failure to thrive. The mom asked the doctors to only look for the few specific genes related to the conditions they were concerned about. She didn't want to know about cancer, diabetes, Alzheimers -  the gamut of things that might affect her little one over the course of her life. She said that she trusted she had enough grace to deal with today's worries but that she didn't want to have to muster the grace for tomorrow's troubles. She could save those worries for another day. Her logic really resonated with me. That definition of grace, and the idea that you don't have to worry about tomorrow sounded like a wonderful way to live life with two kids under two. And I would love it if I could raise Zahra to believe she has the grace she needs, and that tomorrow she will get a fresh stock to use on her worries. I tend to focus on the problems that might be and it is a less peaceful way of living. I think having grace and having peace probably go hand in hand.


Graciousness

1. pleasantly kind, benevolent, and courteous.


2. characterized by good taste, comfort, ease,


Here, I am referring to the more traditional definitions of the word. Graciousness is a quality that I recognize in the people I admire all the time. It is also something that does not come naturally to me. I tend to speak without thinking and that means not always providing comfort and ease to those around me. It isn't the worst problem to have but I imagine it is nice to be able to control your mind and thoughts to always be courteous. It must come from a calm, serene place: I suppose gracious women are full of grace.


Gratitude

the quality or feeling of being grateful or thankful

This is a quality that I actually DO possess and hope to pass on. I think being able to have gratitude for the little things really makes for a happy life. Having a glass half full isn't about being an optimist, its about choosing to view the world in a way that brings you joy. And that is possible for me because I can recognize and be grateful for the little things in my life that light it up. For today, I would say
  • How excited Zayd gets when Sam and I show any affection (to include high-fives, ha ha)
  • Feeding my coworkers completely from scratch chocolate chip banana bread pudding and watching them return for seconds
  • Getting three things off my to do list (of a dozen!+) (a perfect example of half full/half empty)
  • That the people I sat next to at the DMV for 2.5 hours were pleasant and the restroom was clean
  • The nap I had today!
  • Having a nanny
Some of those are obvious. Its easy to appreciate the joy Z brings me. It is harder to sit in the DMV for 2.5 hours and remark on how lucky I am to be sitting next to three twenty-something ladies who all have 2 year olds! But, because I have worked at and believe in gratitude, that is honestly what I came away with. I feel blessed to have honed the skill that is gratitude.

So, on this third day of Zahra, I am hoping that she enters the world with a full stock of grace, grows to become a gracious young lady, and hones the ability to have gratitude for all things big and small.

And as one parting note, I am reminded of Monday's Child. Zayd was a Tuesday baby. Also, tomorrow (Tuesday) is my 30th birthday and a wonderful day to birth a daughter...


Monday's child is fair of face
Tuesday's child is full of grace,
Wednesday's child is full of woe,
Thursday's child has far to go,
Friday's child is loving and giving,
Saturday's child works hard for a living,
But the child who is born on the Sabbath Day
Is bonny and blithe and good and gay.[1]

I will keep you posted...

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