Sunday, December 19, 2010

Speaking from my Spirit

Zayd and I talk a lot these days. Well, one of us is decidedly more vocal than the other. In one of my favorite new tomes, "Superbaby", which comes highly recommended by me, it talks about the importance of narrating to your baby and helping them understanding what is going on in the world around them. (Sort of common sense but the book is great.)

In that vein, I have been narrating all the day long to my sweet little boy. I tell him about what we are doing and what comes next in our day. I explain to him when I am frustrated and I tell him about all of the things that make me joyful every day of the week. I ask him to kick his daddy every night before bed and tell him good morning when he wakes up around 9am. It's simply wonderful and honestly feels like a real conversation (especially when he kicks at my request or seems soothed out of a tantrum when he is kicking on all cylinders).

These conversations have sprouted something in me that I wasn't really expecting: conversations with my gma. Nowadays, I seem to talk to her much more, as well. Even after she died, I have continued to talk to her when I need her or when something amazing happens. Nowadays, I talk to her a couple times a week about anything and everything. For example, yesterday, I drove to the Botanical Gardens to pick up our 2011 Family Membership and I was positively gleeful. This was one of Sam's stocking stuffers and a complete surprise. (He opened his stocking today.) While heading home from the gardens, I told Zayd about how we would walk him there in the summer and look at all of the flowers and trees. And how when he was old enough to walk himself we'd let him run through the field there. Then I told my grandma how great it was going to be and how painting these tableaus for my little peanut makes me warmly happy. I invited her to join us on the trips and thought about how much easier it would be for her now that she doesn't have to breathe and try to keep up. These conversations just happen. I am in the conversation with my gma or my son before I realize that they aren't really around. And its really magical.

Being pregnant makes you really think about those fuzzy lines around life and un-life.

2 comments:

  1. All smiles (and a couple of tears) after reading this one!

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  2. Love you! And send my love to Zayd and Gma too!

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